I’m all for sharing information. I don’t have a problem (never have) saying what’s on my mind, and being overtly private has never been a huge concern. I have always been on the loud end of the spectrum, and not minding too terribly much being slightly to the left of the center of attention.
When I joined Facebook two years ago, it was with a flourish of self-indulgence—after all, now everyone could read what I was up to, see carefully selected pics of the fam, and be constantly (and without awaiting solicitation) updated as to my status.
My highly opinionated opinions ran the gamut on what I thought I knew best—pop culture; TV, film, and everything deemed juicy gossip fodder.
But lately, I have started to wonder, just what is really appropriate to share on Facebook?
With everyone’s bloated list of friends carrying a large majority of 'friendquaintences' (i.e. little Johnny from 5th grade that launched spit balls at you in math class for half a year), is it really the platform to be sharing the most private and sensitive of information?
Just a few months ago, friends of my husband and I learned they were pregnant. We, along with the rest of their Facebook flock found out they were expecting a baby via a Facebook status post. Almost instantly, their home pages were inundated with congratulatory messages, and within moments, people who they wouldn’t have told they were pregnant in the real world, were offered a window into their private life. This was made all the more complicated when they lost the baby to miscarriage in the first trimester. Now, in addition to dealing with an incredibly crippling circumstance, they had to deal with hundreds of 'friends'.
Just yesterday, my husband mentioned that an unknown Facebook friendquaintance— (let’s confess, we all harbour some friendly unknowns who, when the request for Facebook friendship was made, we dared not ask ‘who are you’?)—posted the news of her toddler son’s death on Facebook on the day he passed away. I have to admit, hearing of the post made me uneasy.
Not for the news itself, as I too have lost a child and needed comfort. The unsettled feeling in my stomach came from the knowledge that in the midst of what must have been the worst day of her life, this woman felt like she had to update her ‘friends’. What also intensified my queasiness was the fact that such emotionally and personally devastating news was sandwiched between other people’s weekend-plan soliloquies and vacation photo posts.
The mundane with the tragic, all blended together for friends, casual acquaintances, colleagues, and often complete strangers to voyeuristically consume and digest.
And then, almost methodically, move on to someone else’s link to the 'Stupid Video of the Week'.