I am an unapologetic sap, and unabashed romantic to boot. I cry at weddings, believe in true love, and can burst into tears at the drop of a hat if the right song happens to come on the radio. So I am of course anticipating the highly touted return of Peace River's (AB) own sweetie pie--and Jason Mesnick cast-off--Jillian Harris as the new
Bachelorette. (Premiering tonight on ABC.)
I will of course watch for the same reasons everyone will: the highly embarrassing, uncomfortable, and awkward first few episodes that make up the delicious trainwrecks of awesome. (Case in point: Jillian gets a breakdance lesson in a floor-length gown the first episode. Because nothing says ‘let’s get it on’ quite like a windmill to the head.)
I will of course also watch for the gorgeous men, (have you seen the trailers?!), and the pissing contests they will subsequently engage in—not necessarily for the sake of a beautiful woman, but for their own ego stroking master class.
But most of all, I will watch for the handful of men that will honestly and earnestly fall for our prairie girl, and watch as she too gets swept away in the romance of possibility, and her imagined happily ever after...
On that note, Adam Lambert, will you marry me? While highly unlikely given the not-so-ambiguous (but yet to
be completely confirmed) gay vibes, can I atleast watch you kick some serious Kris Allen derriere, and lend some credibility to
American Idol's grandiose sense of self-importance? There is
nothing this guy can’t do, and while I too appreciate the subtlety and mesmerizing calmness of Kris' vocals, the massacre cannot be stopped, and will come this Tuesday and Wednesday via a leather-clad, guyliner-wearing, black polish-loving, ferocious rock chameleon whose album I can’t wait to buy.
So eat up reality TV junkies, as this week, (along with the highly-awaited return of
So You Think You Can Dance-YAY!) , a gluttonous reality feast has been prepared, and I will more than happily gorge—guilt, shame and calorie-free.