Today is December 23rd – the official start of the holiday shopping season for dads.
You may think that’s late. But no, it’s not. Tomorrow, half an hour before the mall closes. That’s late. Today is just enough time.
You see, Christmas shopping for dads is like removing a bandage. It’s going to hurt so it needs to be as short and as quick as possible.
It’s like a fatherhood Black Friday out there. Right now the malls are teeming, if not bursting with dads. All searching for that perfect Christmas gift for their kids, and there’s nary a list in sight. December 23rd is too late for lists. Besides lists are pointless for dads. Moms shop from lists. Dads shop with their gut.
It’s instinctual. It’s something left in that lizard part of our brains. We’re doing the hunting. Most of us.
Some dads have already completed their Christmas shopping. Those dads cheated. They never visited the mall. They never even went online. They let their wives do it for them. It’s a classic dad move. It adds more surprise to the holidays. On Christmas morning you’re just as surprised when the gift is opened. And then after the gift is opened you have to feign knowledge of its purchase.
“Oh, we looked everywhere for it.”
I’m not at that stage of fatherhood yet. I’m still the one choosing a gift for my daughter. I’ll be at the mall with all the other dads looking for jing-tinglers, flu-flubers, tar-tinkers, hoo-hoovers, and Zhu Zhu pets.
Fighting the traffic, frantically moving from store to store, begging sales staff for help – that’s as much a part of fatherhood as reading bedtime stories or changing diapers. Most dads, I’m sure would choose changing diapers over finding gifts.
Finding the gift isn’t even the most difficult part; wrapping is the really difficult part. If you see a gift under the tree that looks like it was wrapped with the dexterous fingers of a tiny elven Martha Stewart, then it’s from mom. If however you see a gift that looks like it was wrapped by a cloven-hoofed reindeer without tape, then thank your dad. He probably spent more time wrapping it.
My shopping will be extra easy this year. My daughter is a toddler. She still doesn’t understand Christmas. If it’s anything like her birthday, her favourite gift will be the shiniest wrapping paper or a bow. A quick trip to the mall won’t even be required, I could probably by her gift at the gas station. Or I could even buy her a gift that I want for myself – another classic dad move.
My Christmas shopping will be quick and painless this year, for my daughter at least.
Christmas shopping for my wife, that never gets any easier. Which is why I need to go to the mall to finish/start my shopping.
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For more holiday fun, get great gift, food and decor ideas — or print some free gift tags for those last-minute gifts. Visit sweetspot.ca/holiday.