About Carly Cooper
A certified Life Coach for Moms and creator of www.balance-the-mother-load.com, Carly Cooper’s blog offers helpful strategies for mothers struggling with guilt, unrealistic expectations and the inability to balance it all – with a generous dose of laughter.
One Day at a Time
balance the mother load canada
(Nov.25.09)
Hello, my name is Carly and I'm a video monitor addict.
My first time "using" was almost three years ago when my sister bought it for us as a baby gift. In the beginning, I didn't think a video monitor was necessary. We lived in a small condo and our walls were very thin. I figured I'd be able to hear when my son cried. But my sister persisted and promised that it would change my life.
We set up the video monitor when we moved our son from our room into his crib. From the minute we plugged it in, I was hooked. The feelings of freedom that this monitor gave me were nothing short of euphoric. Sleep training was a breeze. When my son was freaking out, I was able to let him cry it out with ease because I could click on the monitor and see that he was ok. And click I did. In fact, I was a serious pusher. Every time I heard as much as a squeak, I'd push that button down and instantly I'd feel a sense of calm wash over me.
It's safe to say that I'm heavily dependent on this monitor. I did try a few times to kick the habit. When we travelled or went to my Dad's cottage, I purposely left the monitor at home and went cold turkey. But instead of getting the restful sleep I was used to, I became paranoid, neurotic and all strung out. I've dabbled in other kinds of monitors that just offer a sound option. But once I had a taste of the best, I found myself jonesing for a fix of my good old faithful.
Life with a baby seemed more manageable when I had my video monitor by my side. So you could imagine my horror when I woke up one morning to a burned out monitor. I panicked. My husband had to talk me off the ledge and told me it was probably just the battery. The problem is, you have to order the battery from the company and it takes about a week to arrive! I desperately pleaded with them on the phone to try and send it sooner. I even said I would pay for a courier. No dice.
I felt physically sick. We had just moved my son into his big boy bed. How was I going to score a battery before bedtime? The cold hard fact was, I wasn't. I was just going to have to learn to deal.
The first night of my video monitor withdrawal was rough. My son refused to go to bed. He kept coming out of his room, and was screaming and crying every time I would put him back. I felt tired, hungry and desperate to drown my sorrows watching my "one and only source into the scandalous lives of Manhattan's elite" on Gossip Girl. After about an hour of not getting through to my son, I got a pressure gate and put it in front of his door. I explained that it wasn't a punishment, but that it was getting dark and I wanted to keep him safe in his room. The drama ensued and we finally compromised on him sleeping on the floor.
I made a point of checking in on him a few times that night. It wasn't ideal, but I made it through. I know the day will come when I have to stop using and kick the habit for good. But until I find the right ankle monitor, I'm just not quite ready to go clean.
So for now, I'm taking things one day at a time and saying my Serenity Prayer. "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
Any other monitor addicts out there?