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Carly Cooper

About Carly Cooper

A certified Life Coach for Moms and creator of www.balance-the-mother-load.com, Carly Cooper’s blog offers helpful strategies for mothers struggling with guilt, unrealistic expectations and the inability to balance it all – with a generous dose of laughter.

You Name It

balance the mother load canada (Dec.02.09)    


Last week, I was one of the millions of viewers who tuned into the American Music Awards. Even if you didn't waste three hours watching it, I'm sure you've heard about the controversy surrounding Adam Lambert's lewd performance that closed the show. But to me, the most appalling moment of the evening was when Jermaine Jackson revealed the name of his youngest son while accepting an award on his late brother Michael's behalf.

Did you catch it? Are you sitting down? Wait for it... Jermajesty. Excsqueeze me? It's a good thing the Jackson's have money to buy this kid personalized stuff because the chances of Jermajesty finding a mug with his name on it are about as likely as me winning an Oscar for best actor.

And Jermaine isn't the only celebrity who is guilty of name abuse. Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin named their son Moses. Some might think, what's wrong with that? It's a strong biblical name. True. But unless this kid can act, sing or part the puddles in the playground, Moses has some big sandals to fill. And who's gonna protect him in case he gets teased? His sister Apple? But with celebrity comes really good bodyguards, so they'll probably be ok.

There are also other ways of making names difficult for kids. Like how we choose to spell them. Let's take a simple, nice name like Jordan for example. Great for girls or boys and pretty easy to pronounce. So why on earth would someone complicate it by spelling it like "Jourdynn". The “u”, the “y” and the extra “n” are all irrelevant and will most likely create issues for the child later. There will be inevitable spelling errors and possible mispronunciations leaving the child feeling frustrated.

When you're expecting, it's easy to get caught up in the search for the perfect name. I understand the desire to want your child to be an original and unique. To find a name that has a deep meaning. But be cautious in your search. If I based my son's name on how he made me feel when he was inside my womb, his name would be Saltine!

It's important to think beyond the cute stage of an infant. A sweet, innocent baby can pull off a name like Fifi Trixibelle (Bob Geldof and Paula Yates' kid), Pilot Inspektor (Jason's Lee's kid) and Moxie Crimefighter (Magician Penn Jillette's kid). At least Penn can teach his child to disappear when someone's coming to steal her lunch money. Or is Moxie a boy?

Raising well-adjusted, secure and confident kids is hard enough. If you choose to give them an unusual name, I'd suggest enrolling them in a martial arts program. And hope that their teacher is Sylvester Stallone's kid Sage Moonblood.

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