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Pop in when you have a few spare moments for a cosy chat. Read about real-mom experiences and contribute your own slices of life at our Drop-In Centre.

Through the Looking Glass

drop-in centre canada (Jan.08.10)


 
They asked me to sign the papers, these emergency room minions, clad in minty hues and efficient smiles. I stared at them, my vision a little blurred from our 12-hour ordeal. My son lay on the enormous trolley bed, gaping at all the types of casts and various lengths of crutches. We were only there for a broken arm, but they still had to set it. They had to put him under, and I had to give the okay.

“The Ketamine will make him black out. He won’t remember anything we do. Talk to him about his special place, so he can go there.” I shared a look with my husband. Ketamine, where had I heard that before? It came to me, in a smoke-filled memory.

A loud party, a booze-fuelled celebration. I squeezed my way into a kitchen and a conversation. “So, he took too much Special K, and he didn’t wake up for a whole day!”

“What’s Special K?” I asked, ignorant. It’s explained to me: how you take it, what it does to you, who has tried it. I shrugged and tried to smile, thinking, I am too old for this crap. It’s not even interesting.

I am interested now. I sign the papers, and whisper in my son’s ear thoughts of the ocean, skipping rocks, looking for crabs. I see him slide into a daze, pupils dilating. They shunt us from the room, telling us we don’t want to be there for what comes next.

We leave and my mind wanders to the future, to my teenage son trying to sneak into the house, only to find his mom waiting. His eyes are dilated. I desperately want to know where his happy place is, and if he can find it without drugs.

Erin MacNair is a mother, freelance writer and metalsmith, residing in Vancouver with her family. She blogs at www.themomoirproject.com, and is published in other mother-centered magazines.

Want to contribute as a guest blogger to Drop-In Centre? Email us at smwl[AT]sweetspot[DOT]ca.




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