About Guest Blogger
Pop in when you have a few spare moments for a cosy chat. Read about real-mom experiences and contribute your own slices of life at our Drop-In Centre.
Share and Share Alike
drop-in centre canada
(Feb.05.10)
With twelve years between my eldest and youngest sons, it’s not surprising some things have changed at the playground. For one thing it’s not about sharing anymore. It’s about taking turns. The distinction? I managed to ask that very question of the community playgroup facilitator, who recently took me aside following my three-year-old’s refusal to hand over the toy tractor he had managed to monopolize from every other child in the room.
“Lyam!” I intervened firmly as my darling boy cheekily held the tractor over his head just out of reach. “You’ve had that tractor long enough and it’s time for you to share.”
Loosening his superhuman toddler grip from the plastic wheels and leading him into the play kitchen in an attempt to turn his attention elsewhere I felt a hand on my arm.
“In this room we don’t use the word share,” the smiling face right in mine informed me with irritating politeness. “We say taking turns.”
“And the difference is what?” I asked genuinely confused.
“Taking turns doesn’t make children feel ashamed,” the facilitator explained as from the corner of my eye I saw my son eyeing up the chef’s hat on the little girl making play pancakes at the munchkin-sized stove.
“You’re saying the word share makes them feel shame?” I asked incredulous. I lunged toward my son as he snatched the chef’s hat right offthe girl’s curly blonde head.
“Well yes,” she answered brightly. “Taking turns is easier for them to process emotionally.”
I pried the chef’s hat out of my son’s sweaty hand and handed it back to the little girl, apologizing to her mother, who had been thankfully eavesdropping on the conversation.
“No worries,” she smiled at me before turning to the facilitator. “It was time for her to share anyway.”
Susan Urie lives on Vancouver Island with her husband and two sons. Her work has appeared in a local community magazine entitled “The Beacon”, “Island Parent” magazine published out of Victoria and www.themomoirproject.com . She is expecting her third child in March and plans to share, take turns, play nice and continue her literary ramblings on motherhood.
Got a story to share as a guest blogger at our Drop-In Centre? Email us smwlATsweetspotDOTca.