About Sweetmama Editor
Nadine Silverthorne’s love of journaling began in Grade One with the entry, “I am the greatest dancer!” Two babies (and countless diaper changes) later, she has found her home away from home as editor of SweetMama. Don’t miss her humorous bi-weekly accounts of the joys and pains of working while raising them fabulous.
What kind of Grandma is your mom?
silver spoons canada
(Mar.18.10)
My mother was quite happy to transition to grandmotherhood. She falls into the Mrs. Doubtfire-type grandmother role quite naturally. I was the one who refused her staying with us after my babies were born, much to her diasappointment. She stepped in regardless, washing my dishes and clothes, stocking my freezer with casseroles. I will never forget that. I can't imagine getting through those early days without her help.
Still to this day, I rely on her heavily (even though she can be overbearing and advice-y at times). But I realize that I'm spoiled and this level of grandmotherly involvement is not a reality for many. We no longer rely so heavily on our mothers for support for childbirth and childrearing. Many of us live a great distance from our parents, and in modern relationships we rely on our partners to pull their share (something that was unimaginable when our own parents were raising us).
My mother-in-law, who is considerably more hip and active, probably had a harder time when her first grandchild appeared on the scene while in her 50s. She loves my children dearly, but she's usually more hands off and would only reschedule plans to help with the kids if we were really in a bind. I can respect that -- she's raised her own, she's entitled to do what she wants with her time. But the two grandmas are very different in their approaches.
What's your experience been? Did your mother, step-mother or mother-in-law go happily into the grandmother role? Is she helpful or barely there? (Go ahead and vent leave your story in the comments.)