About Sweetmama Editor
Nadine Silverthorne’s love of journaling began in Grade One with the entry, “I am the greatest dancer!” Two babies (and countless diaper changes) later, she has found her home away from home as editor of SweetMama. Don’t miss her humorous bi-weekly accounts of the joys and pains of working while raising them fabulous.
Is Your Partner a Better Mom Than You?
silver spoons: moms vs. dads canada
(May.30.11)
I came across an article in the June issue of Today's Parent magazine in which the writer, Stephanie Rebot Tarling, thinks that her husband may just be a better mom.
I have to admit, I also have these feelings at times. I have written before about my husband's ability to immerse himself in imaginative play, a skill I lack. But as economies shift and roles reverse, are we moving towards a society where men are better at mothering than mothers?
Or are we moms, like the author of the original article, just feeling a bit insecure about our own skills as a parent?
For me, one weekend at home quickly levels the playing field. He's home often during the week, which gives him the flexibility to do pick-up and drop-off, as well as prep dinner. But, without maligning him too much, he lacks the ability to look down the calendar and have a little foresight about the week ahead (or maybe that's just avoidance). The birthday party gift is always purchased the day of. The swimming gear's never packed until 10 minutes before we leave for class. He tends to leave these jobs for me.
While these tasks aren't inherent to good parenting, keeping the household ship running smoothly makes life easier for the family as a whole. I know I'm generalizing, but you would never hear a mom say, "I've been wearing these briefs for four days!" No! We'd have done laundry the day we took our last pair out of the drawer, or gone out and bought some new pairs.
So while he may be the king of distracting children during tantrums and coming up with the best show and tell ideas (the morning of), I think we need to give ourselves a pat on the back for the unsung jobs of motherhood (which get no love in any parenting book or wedding speech). Though our kids won't remember that we made sure they ate their veggies or got the bills paid on time, we just have to be OK with that. Because in the big picture of this family at least, this is the way it works best.
What do you think? Are today's dad better moms than moms? Are their things your partner is better at when it comes to traditional mothering tasks?
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