About Rebecca Eckler
Since becoming pregnant with her daughter Rowan, Canadian journalist and author Rebecca Eckler has penned three hilarious books, including the best-selling Knocked Up. Catch Rebecca’s weekly unique perspective on motherhood and single parenthood.
How do you feel about bribing your children, at any age, with money? Especially when it comes to doing well in school?
I’ve been opposed to this. The idea traumatizes me. Why? Because, way back when I was in high school I learned one of my younger brothers was getting paid $20 for every ‘A’ and $10 for every ‘B’ on his report cards. That was a lot of money back then (and, frankly, still is).
When I found out, boy did I pull a sibling-jealousy-tantrum on my parents. IT SO WASN’T FAIR!!!
So I demanded that I get “rewarded” or “paid” too for every ‘A’ I got on my report card, because how could I not feel like I was losing out just because I was a good student and my brother(s) were not?
“But you get good grades,” my mother said, to which I probably replied, “Yeah, I got all ‘A’s on my report card. So that means you owe me $200.”
Now that I AM a parent, I’m torn on the issue. Yes, I’m not nearly close to the stage where I’ll need to offer my daughter money for good grades. First, she does well (for being in Grade 2.) Second, she still doesn’t have any concept of money.
But flash forward to the future, when she will get graded, and I’d still rather her not know that I may indeed bribe her to do well if money was what it took. (It worked for my brother.)
From the very minute my daughter started school, I made sure that she knew how important getting good marks was, and that she has to behave, respect her teachers, and that I WILL be disappointed if she doesn’t get good grades. (I don’t expect excellent grades, but I do tell her to try her very best.)
If she does poorly on a spelling test one week, the next week we are at home, practicing double and I make her write out the spelling words five times.
But as she gets older, this could all change. Growing up with three siblings, none of whom seemed to excel at school (but all turned out to be productive members of society) I learned that some people just don’t like school, some just don’t care about marks, and others try really hard but still can’t get good marks. (Or there were people like me who everyone should hate because I barely tried and got good grades.)
We all know children need good marks to get into a good university. I’m not a believer that everyone is meant for higher education. But I do wonder what I will do if my daughter ends up doing poorly in high school (years and years from now.) Will I bribe her with money if it will force her to do well? Time, I guess, will tell.
What do you think? Do you or would you bribe your kids with money to get good marks?