About Rebecca Eckler
Since becoming pregnant with her daughter Rowan, Canadian journalist and author Rebecca Eckler has penned three hilarious books, including the best-selling Knocked Up. Catch Rebecca’s weekly unique perspective on motherhood and single parenthood.
Many children are pigeonholed by their teachers. They are either “good kids” or “handful kids.” They are either “shy” or “outgoing.” They are either “very smart” or “consistent.” They either follow the rules or they don’t.
I hate that this happens, but I’m not sure that any parent can control this. Sure, sometimes it is true. And, even us as parents pigeonhole our own children to a certain extent.
I would pigeonhole my daughter as being sweet and kind. On my daughter’s recent report card, the teacher wrote that it was great my daughter joined the school play because it gave her confidence. This is, like, the most insane description I had ever read about my daughter. See, my daughter, I think, has been pigeonholed by her teacher because she is quiet in class and follows all the rules. She is a good girl at school. But there is a difference between being shy and being quiet and good.
My daughter is far from shy. (If the teacher needs to see this he should come out to dinner with us at a restaurant where my daughter has no problem asking questions about the menu and ordering on her own and even flagging down the server for the bill. Or he could come on a TTC bus with us and watch how my daughter asks the driver everything there is to know about how a streetcar runs.) But what got me most is that my daughter is a born performer. There is no better place she likes to be than on stage. So, no, being in the school play did not give her confidence. She already had and has a ton of confidence – maybe too much confidence even – on stage. There is not a microphone anywhere (including on tour buses! It’s true!) she sees that she does not want to start singing into. There is not a stage she sees that she will not dance on, even in front of a couple hundred people. To give the teacher credit, he has only known her for four months. But I really hate the fact that she seems to be pigeonholed as this quiet, shy girl, when really she is just quiet because, well, if she’s not on stage, she is quiet.
Have you ever found that your child has been pigeonholed unfairly? And how can we explain to teachers that they may only see “the school child” as opposed to the “at home child?” Thoughts?
Follow me at @rebeccaeckler.
Image: NCBrian/Flickr
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