We’re celebrating real-life SweetMamas! Whether she’s a famous face or the mom in your playgroup, check back weekly to discover her Sweetest Things, as well as her tips on raising them fabulous.
SweetMama We Love: Lori Lansens
Hometown: Chatham, Ontario, but currently makes her home in Southern California
Mom to: Max (9) and Natasha (7)
Also known as: the author of three riveting novels, The Wife's Tale, Rush Home Road and The Girls, which was a Richard & Judy Best Read of the Year in 2006 (and sold over 300,000 copies in the UK) and a finalist for the Orange Broadband Prize for Fiction.
SM: Tell us a bit about your new book, The Wife's Tale.
The Wife's Tale is the story of Mary Gooch, a morbidly obese middle-aged woman whose husband disappears on the eve of their 25th anniversary. For the first time in her life Mary is forced to leave her comfortable rut to go out in search of him. I'm fascinated by this obese character and have been writing about overweight women since I started writing twenty-five years ago. The story isn't about a woman losing weight, but chronicles her stuggle to gain perspective and insight by confronting her demons and fears - what she calls her "obeast." I'm drawn to characters on the fringes but increasingly, with the national epidemic of obesity, Mary is conspicuous in society.
SM: What’s your secret to raising them fabulous?
My children enjoy watching the TV show Supernanny. One evening after watching the Nanny teach a set of parents how to "play" with and enjoy their young children, my seven-year-old daughter remarked, "That's one thing you can say about our family. We know how to have fun together." We live in the country, spend all of our time together playing sports and board games (no computer time, phones or hand held games!) and doing art and having family book time. We bicker and squabble and sometimes there is yelling but at the end of the day we know we're a team.
SM: What’s been your biggest challenge in balancing motherhood and the other parts of yourself (work, me-time, writing, etc.)?
Like any working mother, I struggle with the demands of motherhood and career and let's not forget partnership! (My husband and I have been together for 26 years and his career is even more demanding than mine!) For me, the job of parenting comes first. During periods of intense writing I am sometimes preoccupied, but my children are still young and demand my presence. My son once said, "You have that look like you're thinking about Mary Gooch."
SM: Knowing what you know now, what’s the one thing you wish you could tell all new moms or moms-to-be?
I wish I'd been stronger and set better boundaries early on. If I had a do-over I would feel less guilty about taking time for myself to see friends or take a walk or get a hair cut. In the early days I felt so physically and emotionally attached to my children (I was a long-term nurser) that I struggled with my own identity. That struggle inspired the idea for my second novel, The Girls, so perhaps it was a journey I needed to take.
What is the one item you can’t live without for yourself?
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My telephone. My family and I moved from Toronto, Canada to Southern California three years ago, leaving behind all of our friends and family. It is vital for me to keep in close contact with my family and friends.
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What is the one item you can’t live without for your children?
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Drawing paper. My children spend a great deal of their spare time drawing and writing stories. I always have a pad of paper in my purse so that they can amuse themselves in the car or when one or the other has been dragged to a sporting match.
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Are you a SweetMama we could love? Want to nominate a SweetMama you know? Email us at SMWL@sweetspot.ca